Finding An Apartment
Most apartment searches begin in the classified section of the local paper. Reading ads is easy, once you know how. Here are some commonly used abbreviations:Some listings look appealing, but be warned: clever advertisers may disguise a property's faults as sellings points. Watch out for lines like these:
Moving Day
On the day you move in to your apartment, inspect the property with your landlord. Make a list of any damage (nails in walls, dirty carpet, etc.) you find. Both you and your landlord should agree on and sign this list so that when you move out, there will be no disputes over whether it was you or the previous tenant who etched lewd drawings into the kitchen cupboards. You are responsible for any damage you do to the apartment beyond normal wear and tear. You and your landlord's idea of "normal wear and tear" may be quite different, though. Here is a handy guide to sort it out.|
Normal Wear and Tear mildly dirty or worn carpet small holes in wall from hanging posters, etc. minor paint chipping refrigerator light bulb burned out cracks in walls due to settling slow draining sink water damage from roof leak dusty curtains or blinds small amount of mildew in bathtub or shower dripping faucet |
Not normal blood stains painted window to achieve classic "stained glass" look fist through wall freezer turned in to airconditioner, McGyver-style removing walls to create "open layout" connected blender, plumbing to offer slurpees-on-tap new open-air skylights curtain rods + creativity = home gym! bathtub aquarium indoor "pool" |
Keeping It Clean
How often you clean you apartment is a function of your personal comfort level and the degree to which your landlord is a fascist clean-freak who believes dusty moldings are the cause of disease outbreaks, death and, ultimately, eternal toil in the dustiest place of all, Hell. So, scrub accordingly. Here are the tools you will need:
Kneepads optional.